Again, the echo of the past reverberates the present. I find myself unemployed, waiting for the phone call which puts me back to work. The days slugging along at a snails pace. Every minute, a seemingly excruciating hour. I have put my internet chatting days behind me yet, during times such as these, I know it is there, at my fingertips. Waiting to pull me back in, to consume my reality. I refuse to let it. I refuse to be that whore biting at the tips of fantasy. I always remember, this too shall pass... And it will. Work will be here soon enough and I'll be wishing for days like these. Almost time for my short, yet surprisingly rewarding workout. Then the throws of boredom benignly set in again. Can work come soon enough?
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
It was a rather dreary, uninteresting day as I remember. I had a lot of time on my hands as the unemployment lines grew long and the greed of corporate America seared my flesh, I had been one of the millions laid off and struggling to keep afloat. Through the mix of angst, boredom and fear, I had decided to find a hobby, something to entertain me for little or no money, I turned to my computer and the internet.
I logged on and searched Google for a chat site and the first listing was a rather benign site called Wireclub.com. I logged in, looked around and created a profile. I sat and waited, fearful of entering a chat, not knowing what to expect. But alas, my curiousity took the best of me and I entered a room. I watched for quite awhile the interactions of persons from across the world flirt, hate, yell, laugh, seeming every virtual emotion vivid and real. I looked at these peoples pictures real or not. I laughed with them and yelled at them. Finally, with my palms slightly perspiring I typed my first word, "Hi" my glorious moment swallowed in whole by the flow of the room, not even a second glance at such a sparse introduction.
I had started a perilous journey into Cyberville, one at the time I realized not the consequences.
The days went on, turning into months. I was logging in daily now, hours at a time. Sometimes, even spend a complete 24 hours of non stop chatting. I was hooked, I had succumbed to Wire.
Every time I logged off, a feeling of dread swept over my body. When could I get my next fix? What if Wire shut down? What if my internet were to suddenly go out? Immediately, I logged back on. I couldn't stand the thought of being away for even a minute. At this point I had stopped eating, I was living on coffee alone. I had lost most of my body mass in just a few short weeks. I could stop, I know I could, but why even try. I love Wire and I am not hurting anyone but myself.
The notices were coming in daily now, my bills weren't getting paid. I didn't care, Wire is all I needed. Until one day, my internet was cut off. I slumped in my chair staring in disbelief at the prompt blinking on my computer. "Connection Unavailable" After a long while, I thought good, I will get out of this rut and get my life back on track.
I didn't even last a few hours, I was shaking pretty bad now, sweating profusely. I was as if tiny spiders were crawling all over my skin. I couldn't handle it. Just an hour on wire is all I needed. But how? I called my friends first. I had already been borrowing money from them for a while now with promises I would pay them back as soon as I got a job. Today my pleas fell on deaf ears. I had to do something now, I couldn't bear being without wire any longer.
I went downtown to the street corner, trying to pan handle a few dollars together. A car pulled to the curb and the window rolled down. "Hey Handsome, why don't you come over here for a minute." A synthesized voice sprang from the vehicle. I leaned through the window putting on a painted smile, "How you doing sweetheart? You need company?" She was about 80 from what I could tell, talking through a voice box and gasping for air through an oxygen line as a lit cigarette dangled from her mouth. The synthesized voice making me cringe, "I have a place just up the street, baby." "Oh yeah? Do you have internet?" I was dreading the response, hoping she would say no. She didn't she nodded and winked and I lifted the handle and slid into the passenger seat as she grabbed my crotch. She put the voice box into my ear and whispered, " you will do just fine." as she licked the nape of my neck. I will have wire for one more hour, I thought just get me out of this reality.
Friday, January 23, 2009
The shade from the trees was a welcoming relief from the blistering heat of the sun. None of them had their swim trunks with them, but it never stopped them before. They all were carrying there gym clothes home for laundry and used them to swim in. George was getting excited. He loved the lake. As the path opened up to the lake, George took off in a full sprint, shedding his shirt and screaming at the top of his lungs, “WOOOHOOO!” He didn’t even bother to change into his gym shorts, he dropped his book bag, pulled his shoes and socks off and jumped into the cool water.
“Come on guys!” he yelled back at Hunter and Theo. “Hold on, I have to change first.” Hunter replied, followed by a grunt from Theo as both of them separated and went in opposite directions into the bushes.
George was doing summersaults underneath the water when the two finally appeared again in there gym shorts and shirts. Hunter tidied her stuff up near the water’s edge as Theo dropped his and jumped in, followed shortly by Hunter. They started splashing each other; the hooting and hollering carried off with the subtle breeze.
An ever so slight grin appeared on Hunter’s pursed lips as she eyed George and began wading over towards him. Theodore, realizing what Hunter was up to started swimming to the other side of George, entrapping him between them. They started closing on him. George figured out what was about to happen a second too late as both Theodore and Hunter grabbed him, Theodore around the neck and Hunter across the shoulders and pushed him deep into the water as his arms and legs flailed about. “This is what you get!” Hunter squealed, laughing hysterically. George managed to break free of the grappling hands and popped to the surface taking in a deep breath, seeing them coming after him again he started swimming deeper into the lake, Theo and Hunter in close pursuit.
George being the strongest swimmer of them all zipped to the other end of the lake with ease reaching the bank, he jumped out and ran up the incline into the bushes. Theo and Hunter made it to the lake’s edge just as George was scurrying back down the lake’s edge. “SHH! Be quiet guys!” he whimpered in a hushed voice, “There’s somebody up there.”
Hunter and Theo both climbed out of the lake and hurried over to George. “What is it? What’s up there?” Hunter asked. “I-I don’t know, I just heard some strange noises.” George responded. “Well, let’s go check it out then.” Hunter said as she started moving up the embankment into the bushes as George and Theo followed closely behind. "There. There it is," Hunter whispered. A small moan as if someone was in trouble or hurt. They peered through the bushes. There in the middle of a clearing was George’s father in the throws of sexual freedom with Hunter’s mother. Theo grabbed Hunter over the mouth just in time to quench an agonizing guttural scream. He pulled her down into the bushes as George, stunned, slowly sat down, his head in his lap. Theo gathered both of them up and prodded them toward the lake.
“You guys have to get it together,” he said, “All of us would be murdered if we ever spoke of what we just saw.” Hunter, looking at her feet and crying, “What of my dad?” she sobbed. It’s all your fault!” she screeched as she started after George. Theo almost tackled her. “Let’s get out of here and figure it out.” He said as all of them started off across the lake to gather their stuff. "This is the most horrible thing ever." Hunter sniffled as they started home.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
They had started off after school as usual, the three of them. George was in the lead, Tall and lanky at 5’8” and barely a hundred pounds, he towered over the others in his 5th grade class as he seemingly started his growth spurt a bit prematurely. He would sometimes forget that the others would almost have to skip-run just to keep up with his normal gait.
As he turned his head he had noticed his friends Theo and Hunter were falling gradually behind as they gave up trying to keep up with him. He slowed, taking half steps as the other two caught up. He looked curiously at the two, a glint of mischief in his eye that didn’t go unnoticed by Hunter as she scrunched up her nose, “What?” She asked hesitantly.
George pushed his ridiculously large, plastic-framed glasses up a bit on his nose and swept his disheveled blonde hair out of his eyes as he looked down at her round, puggish face with her nose all scrunched up disapprovingly, already knowing whatever he was going to say, she was going to vehemently oppose.
“Why don’t we go down to the lake for a swim?” George asked as a slight twisted smile panned across his face.
“Naw, I can’t do that,” Theodore announced,” My pa is expectin’ me home straight from school.” Hunter turned and faced Theo with her hands on her hips. He hated when she did that, he just knew he had said something stupid, although if he thought it was something stupid, he wouldn’t have said it at all. But Hunter thinks most if not everything he says is stupid. Well, Hunter is the smart one, so if she thought it was stupid, then it probably was.
“You Dufus! How’s your pa gonna know you didn’t go straight home after school? Neither your mom or pa get off work until six, none of our parents do.”
“Yeah, guess yer right Hunter, never did think of it that way. Boy, would he sure be mad if he ever found out I didn’t go straight home from school though.”
“How’s he gonna find out?” George chimed in relieved that Hunter’s tirade wasn’t aimed at him this time.
It was a scorcher today, as his dad would say, a day like this would make you want to go to hell to cool off. A hundred and ten is what Miss Parker had said it was in Social Studies and as if for punishment she made us write a whole darn page on Antarctica and penguins and stuff.
“I sure wish I was in Antarctica with those penguins, that’s for sure,” George absently muttered under his breath. Which in turn brought Hunter swiveling around, pony tail whipping violently, almost taking Theo’s head off. “I swear!” she screeched, “I have the two biggest retards as friends! You’d freeze to death in Antarctica don’t you know anything?”
George sheepishly recoiled, a slight shade of red brushing across his face. “Well, I’m just sayin’, sure would be nice to cool off.” Both Theodore and Hunter grunted in agreement as the three of them turned off in unison toward the lake.