Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Hooked on Internet chat..

It was a rather dreary, uninteresting day as I remember. I had a lot of time on my hands as the unemployment lines grew long and the greed of corporate America seared my flesh, I had been one of the millions laid off and struggling to keep afloat. Through the mix of angst, boredom and fear, I had decided to find a hobby, something to entertain me for little or no money, I turned to my computer and the internet.

I logged on and searched Google for a chat site and the first listing was a rather benign site called Wireclub.com. I logged in, looked around and created a profile. I sat and waited, fearful of entering a chat, not knowing what to expect. But alas, my curiousity took the best of me and I entered a room. I watched for quite awhile the interactions of persons from across the world flirt, hate, yell, laugh, seeming every virtual emotion vivid and real. I looked at these peoples pictures real or not. I laughed with them and yelled at them. Finally, with my palms slightly perspiring I typed my first word, "Hi" my glorious moment swallowed in whole by the flow of the room, not even a second glance at such a sparse introduction.

I had started a perilous journey into Cyberville, one at the time I realized not the consequences.
The days went on, turning into months. I was logging in daily now, hours at a time. Sometimes, even spend a complete 24 hours of non stop chatting. I was hooked, I had succumbed to Wire.

Every time I logged off, a feeling of dread swept over my body. When could I get my next fix? What if Wire shut down? What if my internet were to suddenly go out? Immediately, I logged back on. I couldn't stand the thought of being away for even a minute. At this point I had stopped eating, I was living on coffee alone. I had lost most of my body mass in just a few short weeks. I could stop, I know I could, but why even try. I love Wire and I am not hurting anyone but myself.

The notices were coming in daily now, my bills weren't getting paid. I didn't care, Wire is all I needed. Until one day, my internet was cut off. I slumped in my chair staring in disbelief at the prompt blinking on my computer. "Connection Unavailable" After a long while, I thought good, I will get out of this rut and get my life back on track.

I didn't even last a few hours, I was shaking pretty bad now, sweating profusely. I was as if tiny spiders were crawling all over my skin. I couldn't handle it. Just an hour on wire is all I needed. But how? I called my friends first. I had already been borrowing money from them for a while now with promises I would pay them back as soon as I got a job. Today my pleas fell on deaf ears. I had to do something now, I couldn't bear being without wire any longer.

I went downtown to the street corner, trying to pan handle a few dollars together. A car pulled to the curb and the window rolled down. "Hey Handsome, why don't you come over here for a minute." A synthesized voice sprang from the vehicle. I leaned through the window putting on a painted smile, "How you doing sweetheart? You need company?" She was about 80 from what I could tell, talking through a voice box and gasping for air through an oxygen line as a lit cigarette dangled from her mouth. The synthesized voice making me cringe, "I have a place just up the street, baby." "Oh yeah? Do you have internet?" I was dreading the response, hoping she would say no. She didn't she nodded and winked and I lifted the handle and slid into the passenger seat as she grabbed my crotch. She put the voice box into my ear and whispered, " you will do just fine." as she licked the nape of my neck. I will have wire for one more hour, I thought just get me out of this reality.